Friday, February 11, 2011

Listen, Donald. It's not that we don't like you or anything..

"Washington (CNN) -- Just picture the Donald Trump for President bumper sticker: "Barack Obama, You're Fired."

The Conservative Political Action Conference now going on in Washington might as well be a new reality television smash hit: "American Presidential Idol."

Only this time, the man who has served as the leading judge on various versions of "The Apprentice" for 11 seasons on NBC finds himself playing the role of contestant.

Just before Trump's speech to the rowdy CPAC crowd Thursday, a woman yelled: "You're hired." The fact that "The Donald" is being talked about as a serious contender for the White House means the Republican field for 2012 is wide open.

Yup, Donald Trump. We definitely want a gazillionaire like you to have even more undeserved power and be president of the country. I'm sure you won't completely satisfy you're own business needs first and I'm sure you completely understand foreign and military affairs. I don't trust anyone who can't get their fucking hairdo to stay on their head to be the most famous person in America. I also don't trust his funny accent.

I'm not a gold digger or anything (I'm a fucking journalism major, for crying out loud. Money's not exactly my top priority in life) but there's a good amount of people I'd fuck just because they're so damn rich. George Bush, check. Yao Ming, check. Justin Bieber, check. Donald Trump? Fucking no way in hell. And that's pretty much how I pick my presidents, so he definitely can't take over the White House. You're not bangable, you're not getting my vote. Sorry I'm not sorry.

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