SUN!!!!!!!!

I had to sit through 3 hour and fifteen minute classes today before I could get outside. It was not easy. The entire time I was literally itching in my seat and by the end of my last class I was so antsy I think my professor let us go just because she saw me squirming. I guess I'm immature when it comes to nice weather.

I ran back to my dorm after class and got dressed and was out the door runnig 15 minutes later and it was stupendous. I cranked out just under 8 miles with an average of 9:10 splits, which considering how much less i've been running, is amazing for me. The new weather has inspired me to start running more...I couldn't take any more of these dreary runs. PLUS, I don't have to haul my ass out of my warm bed anymore at 8 in the morning (shhh...that's early for me) because we pushed the clocks ahead and now it stays light out past six!

So anyway, over break we bought furniture for the apartment I'm living in next year. I'm really excited because my mother let me get a full sized bed and that's glorious. I also might be scheduling all of my classes on tuesdays and thursdays so I only have to drive to campus twice a week. Oh, the possibilities!

It all is coming down to advising appointments though, which my professors definitely don't go out of their ways to schedule. One told me i need to go through her secretary (seriously?), but that's pretty good compared to my other one who has yet to respond to me at all. I need to come up with a plan of study, and I feel like juggling an idea between two different advisors is going to be a bit of a challenge. Or maybe they don't care at all, which is more likely.

Regardless, this weather has put me in a GREAT mood and tomorrow is st. patrick's day which is even better.

I think I might go roll arond in the grass, bye bye.

break should be shorter

I feel like I missed out this break. A friend of mine grabbed a group of friends to go to NYC for two days and she forgot to call me because it was "last minute." Not the greatest friend in my opinion, but oh well.

Some friends also invited me to FL to build houses and such for the week, but I turned it down because it was $200 and I thought I would have too much work to go. I DID have a lot of work, so it might've been better I didn't go, but the new york thing kind of upset me. I shouldn't have expected anything really different from this person and maybe it wasn't entirely her fault, but another friend was asking me why i didn't go and nobody ever even informed me a trip was in the works. I guess I just kind of felt left out. I'm sure nobody meant anything by it, but still...kind of sucks.

Anyway, I'm ready to get back to school. Home is super boring, nobody else is around except for one friend, and hanging out with my parent's is driving me to my breaking point. Also, when I'm home all I do is brew thoughts in my head about Casey and I don't want to be stuck in the mindset. If i get back to school, it'll take my mind off things.

I'm also just really hungry and waiting for my mom to get home with Chinese food. That's probably making me cranky. I'm just really, really sick of break.

sad, sad news.

One of my best friends from high school, Casey, passed away today.

I can't even begin to describe the amazing person Casey was. She was funny, kind, always knew how to make you laugh, and probably one of the most talented people I ever knew. She was an amazing filmmaker and she was even voted "Most Likely To Be Famous" in our graduating class at Miss Porter's. I always joked with her that she had to let me be her "manager" when she was famous since I probably wouldn't have a job and she'd be filthy rich.


Casey was diagnosed with cancer our junior year, and she was out of school most of our senior year.

Casey with one of our teachers in the hospital while getting Chemotherapy

Honestly, when I heard the news, I almost didn't even think twice about it. I just kind of assumed she would be fine because she was the Casey I always knew and loved. She was fine, too. She would joke about how the steroids would make her want to eat steak for breakfast, and we tried to contact Andrew McMahon a few times using her cancer as the connecting factor in their lives. She also asked for a jet plane from the "Make a Wish Foundation" (she settled on a hot tub). That's the kind of person she was, laughing and joking throughout the whole thing. She never once showed how much she was hurting or suffering. She even ended up making it to prom that year.

Casey and I at prom.

I got the call early today. Apparently some tumors had resurfaced, and she needed a bone marrow transplant. Her doctors were shutting down her immune system so she wouldn't reject the marrow, and she caught an infection. Her body just couldn't fight it off.T

The whole thing has been so shocking and sad. Casey deserved so much better than to be fighting this horrible disease for so many years, and she had such a future. She lived so big, and I can't even imagine all the things she was going to do and the great person she was going to be. She had the rare gift to be able to reach a lot of people and make her voice heard, and for the world to lose her is a tragedy.

I want people to know the great person Casey was. I could review in my head all the ways I could've been a better friend to her these last few months (we hadn't spoken as much when we were both at separate colleges), but I realized I want to remember her for all the fun we had. She kept me sane at all-girls school, and I could never repay her. I know she would not want me to be so upset (she'd probably have a joke about this right about now), but it's hard knowing that somebody so amazing is gone.

Rest in peace, Casey. I will never, ever forget you.

The magazine's up!

The magazine is up and running!

Check it out here:

http://greencandypawsmag.com

Read the blog here:

http://greencandypaws.blogspot.com/

Follow it on Twitter here:

http://twitter.com/GCPmegazine


check out page 20 for an adorable little picture of my cat, Dusty, as well :)

the joys of a major diet change

So literally the second I started this new food switch my body purged itself of...everything. I knew this would happen because every time I go vegan the lack of shit in my body makes my system go nuts. It might be a product of me feeling a little under the weather as well, but either way, it was a serious cleanse.

I still am cheating slightly on the veganism (i put skim milk in my cereal since soymilk has been making my throat itch horribly) and i caved and ate a mini snickers. I blame hormones. Either way, if I keep eating cereal i might have to stick to skim milk with it. I don't want to keep having an allergic reaction every time I eat, and its not worth it when I can just put skim milk in it. I've been experimenting with rice milk, but lately my dining hall has only had chocolate rice milk, which is not really a prime ingredient for cereal. Besides those two things, I've been doing good.

Being far from Whitney (the vegan dining hall) makes this diet infinitely more difficult. Whitney makes meals that are awesome for vegans: bourbon tofu, tempeh and broccoli stir fry, bao balls, they cater so well to those wanting to follow the lifestyle. The other dining halls...not so much. I find myself making hummus sandwiches and eating TONS of boca burgers when i'm stuck at any other dining hall on campus. They usually have some sort of vegan option, but it's usually something like white rice and beans or pasta primavera. Just following vegan guidelines isn't good enough for me. i want to choose whole grains and filling foods, and neither of those fit that category in my opinion.

Despite the hassle, I love being vegan. Once i figured out good protein sources, I could tell my body liked it. It opened my eyes to eating pure and whole foods, and to not automatically reach for cookies because they taste good. When I go vegan, my body adapts itself to a diet with less sugar and salt, and it's like bringing myself back to where I want to be nutritionally. I can let myself get really out of whack sometimes, and I definitely did this semester. I was eating ice cream twice a day, and sometimes just wandering around the dining hall picking at baked goods and fried food thinking that it didn't make a difference. i'm ready to get past all of that.

Back to my old ways

I'm going to go back to veganism for awhile. It was something a dabbled with freshman year when I lived super-close to the vegan dining hall on campus (something I still wish was part of my life), but I gave it up when I was consciously trying to put on weight and I rediscovered my love of ice cream.

That said, I've been eating like total shit lately. Ice cream, cookies, just WAY too much crap food that is not good in any way. I'm not saying that eating this stuff is bad. I just have been overloading on it and the damage has taken its toll. Eating vegan reminds me what whole, nutritious food is like...something i need to be brought back to.

Anyway, I started out today but then caved and bought a yogurt. There was nothing nutritious where I was, so yeah, bad start. BUT the point is to ease myself into it and to recognize when I'm reaching for something that is yucky and devoid of nutrients. I know how to make good choices, I just need to put the concept into practice.

But anyway, veganism generally is not hard for me because I've never liked meat, but I'm slightly allergic to soymilk (my stomach gets very queasy when i drink too much of it and my throat will tighten), so that might be a little tough to get around. I'm going to try to water it down. That said, some things will definitely be hard for me to give up.

To name a few:

1. ICE CREAM. i have a huge love affair with ice cream. Especially on campus, they have so many flavors that I literally lose my mind sometimes.

2. chocolate. I hate dark chocolate, and milk chocolate is just so, so yummy.

3. cookies. The milk and eggs unfortunately make this not vegan, and that totally sucks.

I also want to preface this with I am not overly conscious about this. I don't avoid certain ingredients like that plague because they are a byproduct of a chemical once found in an animal that lived on Pangaea. Basically, i don't read ingredients in-depth. Also, if I'm ever at a super nice restaurant where eating vegan just isn't an option, I will abandon it. I don't ever want to have to be accommodated--although people are generally super nice about that--so I just will suck it up when I need to.


Wish me luck on my endeavors :)

Oh Dear

this little piggy drank a little too much last night. I woke up dizzy, nauseous, and about ready to pass out.

I got up to go to the bathroom and when i got there I got this overwhelming sense that I was going to faint. I was brushing my teeth and literally supporting myself entirely on the counter, wondering how I was going to make it back to my room. I sat down on the potty to regroup and then worked my way back.

My stomach was so upset but I knew I needed to eat something, and strangely I was having cravings for really heavy, salty food. So i ate pizza and baked ziti and felt a hundred times better. Weird, right?

Tonight i'm taking it super-easy. super, duper easy.